August 11th, Octopus
Sometimes some people do not understand boundaries! These are something that everybody should have! This is also an act of self-love! When you’ve been around someone and end up feeling drained or uneasy it’s because there are no healthy boundaries present in that relationship.
If you don’t have boundaries it’s time to make some! It’s best not to involve yourself in other people business today, or ..ever.. especially when it does not involve You! Also don’t over-share information about yourself – this isn’t what it means to be close in a relationship! This is unnecessary suffering. When in a relationship .. being needy or clingy, or lacking courage brings you out of balance.
Establish boundaries today for yourself, for others. Be patient with yourself – habits can be hard to break, but you can do this!
Tricia of FreeBirdJourneys.com ✔
Tarot Readings via email start at $20USD, Phone Readings start at $35USD. Visit my website for more information. Link above✔🔝
#boundaries #relationships #suffering #balance #courage
#joy #happiness #share #tarot #tarotcardreader #patience #smallbusinessowner #colorado #montevista #triciastarot #freebirdjourneys
One thought on “Boundaries!”
Bravo! And Kudos to you, for having them. However…..here’s a little Test (what would you do?) to see if you really mean it. Here goes, with an everyday scenario that could easily happen in real life.
Intro: To give a basic idea/example: A co-worker is giving you a ride home from work. They have music on in their car. It’s not that it’s too loud, you just don’t like it. But hey! They are doing you a favor and they are in charge in their own car just as they are in their own house. So suck it up and shut up. And Respect their turf! Right? After all, you are not in charge here.They are. But—some people try to be anyway. And this leads us right into “Boundaries”. Imagine this, it could easily happen. Will you stand up for your legitimate rights or let yourself get shamed into doing things their way? Who is in charge at *their* house? Likewise, you have the same rights. So now, we come to this next part:
A family member is riding with you in *your* car and you have the radio or a music CD on while driving. Its music you really like, but they say the music sucks and to turn it off. How do you (or anyone reading this) feel about this conversation? Here is what I feel they would be likely to say, and my responses:
Them: Gawd, that music sucks. Shut it off.
Me: I like it and this is my car.
Them: But I’m a “captive audience”.
Me: #1–NO ONE forced you to ride with me! And its my car. #2–Would you tell someone else what TV channel to have on if you were in their house? 3– a stranger or coworker wouldn’t even make an issue of it. It would simply be Understood. They are on MY “turf”. My house, my car, my rules. You have the same rights. But right now, you’re here.
Them: Well, iiiii wouldn’t do things like that. I’d shut it off it you were in my car.”
Me: Maybe. But you would be within your rights either way. But even aside from that: Your-choices-dont-obligate-me!
Them: well, you could have a little more consideration.
Me: IIII could? 2 replies: #1. who is on who’s “turf” here? When iiii’m the passenger, or a visitor at someone else’s place, I do things *their* way. They, or you, can show “consideration” and respect by doing the same for me. and #2. What would I do if you weren’t even here? I’d enjoy this music. Question: why should I diminish my enjoyment any less, or inhibit myself just because you are here?
Them: That sounds selfish. 15 minutes without your music wouldn’t kill you.
Me: And 15 minutes of hearing it won’t kill you, either. I am within my rights if its in my house, on my property or in my car. Just like you are.And another thing, any NON-family person would just know that they aren’t the one’s in charge. Why do I get more respect from people who are *not* family? That’s weird.
Them: Gawd, I hate driving with you.
Me: I can stop the car. You are free to go. No one ever forced you at all.
Comment: There! That should cover the likely objections and arguments. One more thing—suppose I *did* give them their way on this bit with the radio. How soon would it be before they found 6 other ways and situations for me (or you) to be more “considerate” ? You get to be “courteous” but they will never admit to being “manipulative”, bossy, or trying to run things when they are at your place, will they? I didn’t think so. It’s an ongoing battle but we usually feel better when we stand up for our rights